Log in

Anti-Shur'tugal [entries|friends|calendar]
Anti-Shur'tugal - Debate and Discussion

[ website | Anti-Shur'tugal ]
[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

Anti-Shirt live meet ups/Skype or Discord watching of the finale of GoT S7 [20 Jul 2017|12:44am]

The Epistler and I have been chatting, and we thought that it might be fun for us to have a bit of a meet up. We're scattered across the globe, so it could never be a full meet up, but we might be able to meet some of our fellow Antis who live in nearby regions.

It's also possible that we could do a massive Skype or Discord session and watch the finale to this season of Game of Thrones so that everyone can "meet" up in some form.

What do you all think?
28 Anti-Riders|Speak out

Paolini and that group of writers that popped up in the late 2000s, and then were never seen again. [19 Jul 2017|12:25pm]
Back in the late 2000s-early 2010s, the whole vampire/horror/young adult in general fad was going on strong, and with it came a lot of authors who published a series, and became popular through those books, and then completely dropped off the map once the fad was over. They either never published a book again, or anything else they managed to get published didn't sell half as well. I just find it interesting how Paolini is one of these people, especially when you consider how other authors fared.

For an opposite example, Rick Riordan technically wasn't part of that trend, as he published the first PJ book a few years before it really took off, though he profited off it, and he's managed to stay relevant and well-known simply by writing a lot.
7 Anti-Riders|Speak out

Three Things you would change of Inheritance [19 Jul 2017|10:33am]
[ mood | happy ]

Welcome everyone to the last of the series, Three Things you would Change:
Today's subject is the final novel of Paolini's series, Inheritance.
Okay first off, I haven’t actually read Inheritance. I could never make it past the Black Brick. So this is based purely on what I saw from other peoples summaries. Also due to changes like Jeod dying in Eragon, certain plot points would have to happen differently.

Change 1:
The Daethdart does not exist. It serves no purpose other than to provide a way to kill Shruikan anticlimactically, and any menace it might have had is undermined by Saphira surviving with no ill effects. It only serves to highlight the main characters plot armor, and therefore undermine the Empire’s menace.

Change 2:
No pointless siege of Aroughs sub plot. As a matter of fact, there is only one siege in the story and that is the siege of Uru’baen, undertaken as a sort of last hurrah for a rebellion which sees no hope of victory. Leading into my next one, Galbatorix opts to just shoot the rebellion and ride out on Shruikan.

Change 3:
Shruikan and Galbatorix are not offhandedly killed off in a Belgarion ripoff. Instead, Galbatorix rides out on Shruikan to duel Eragon in single combat. Eragon is forced to the limits of his power, skill and cunning, and Galbatorix isn’t even trying. Then Murtagh succeeds in breaking free of Galbatorix’s grip and stripping him of his wards.
This gives Eragon the opening he needs to deal a mortal blow to Galbatorix, and in so doing granting Shruikan peace at last. Everyone is happy, the villain who has died is at least mildly villainous and our hero doesn’t deserve to be shot in the head.

Anyway, those are my ideas for what three things I would change in each book. What are yours?

2 Anti-Riders|Speak out

What Will Happen in Eragon 4: Chapter 5: Murtagh [19 Jul 2017|06:35pm]


Sorry for the delay, but aside from me going away for a week, and then having various duties and responsibilities and other things that needed to be done (for example, I replaced my old computer desk and all my various office accessories, pen cups, folders, boxes, and so on, with a setup composed of two chests of drawers and a bookshelf, so I’ve been spending a lot of time working out how to organise all my stuff into the drawers so it makes sense and is useful), I also really, really don’t want to deal with this chapter. theepistler, as much as I love you (not like that, guys, eww), I really hate you for talking me into this. It's just awful.

Collapse )

Next up: the amazing spectacle of the self-immolation of what's left of my soul, otherwise entitled: "Chapter 6: Arya, The Proud Princess".

21 Anti-Riders|Speak out

Saphira's Fire Breath [18 Jul 2017|03:21pm]
[ mood | Bored ]

So in the climax of Eragon Saphira climactically breathes fire. This moment, of her finally doing what dragons are most known for, could have been incredibly awesome. However, it is badly undermined by the fact that the only effect this fire has is to distract Durza so Eragon can get a free hit in and be the hero.

This badly foreshadows Saphira's status as a satellite character to Eragon, only serving as a vehicle to make him more awesome.

So one small change which would have greatly improved the first book is this:
Have Saphira learn to breathe fire early. Basically this:
[Spoiler (click to open)]
Eragon and Murtagh ran with all their hearts, minds and bodies, but it was no good. They were too tired, the mountains too distant. The urgals were gaining on them little by little and nothing they could do could change the fact. Desperately Eragon drew his sword and whirled around.
'It's no good!' he cried 'We'll have it make a stand!'
'We can't take that many.' said Murtagh, though he halted and drew his own blade.
'Maybe,' said Eragon 'but we can make them regret attacking us.'
'No,' said Saphira 'there is a better way.'
The dragon descended from the skies above towards the urgals who looked up with swords waving. Saphira shot over them and opened her mouth and from it poured forth a wave of fire which she sprayed over their ranks. The urgals screamed as the first few lines were consumed in flame, burning horribly. The others tried to scatter, but too late as Saphira breathed again to consume them.
Those few that survived turned and fled in fear back to the main army. Saphira flew back and landed before them, looking very proud of herself.
'Saphira, that was amazing!' said Eragon.
'No time.' said Murtagh 'We have to go now, more will be coming to replace them. And they will have bows this time.'
They fled, yet the urgals were cautious not to overtake them for some time afterward.

Basically, have Saphira unleash her fire on the urgals so they can escape to Farthen Dur. From there she can do the same and be totally awesome in the final battle with her flames burninating huge numbers of urgals. This would make Saphira be a huge asset in her own right, and provide a triumphant reason why dragon riders were so deadly.
I mean to make a sequel to this post examining what could have happened after this to in turn make the battle with Durza better.

15 Anti-Riders|Speak out

Tournament of los potential, Final Round: Main characters [18 Jul 2017|06:05pm]

[ mood | relieved ]

Hello there! It has been quite a while since I visited this site. I have been very busy and couldn't dedicate myself to this, and i had a LOT to say. For now, I'm going to finish this series and maybe commente here and there for a while. So, final round!
This one is going to be a little different, since we are going to look (Mostly) at the root of the Inheritance, the rule of "the least changes the best" is gone. I´m going to rank the characters simply from smallest to biggest improvement, changes are neccesary this time around.
Collapse )
As I said before, the list goes on, and on, and on. The only reason this series wasn´t mature or creative is probably because the author himself isn´t either mature or creative.  It personally think that is one of the reasons this community is so big and durable. (Other than hatred for the author’s undeserved popularity) I haven´t seen this kind of antis coming from books like the Eye of Argon or the Maradonia Saga despite being far worse books. There isn’t much to rescue from them.
In the Inheritance cycle, the narrative seems to actively dodge the most interesting conflicts simply because is the easy route to take. This applies not only to the characters, but the entire world itself, from the magic to the species that inhabit it.

That is what I’ll try to look for in my following posts, as soon as I have some more time to spare. Meanwhile enjoy this and feel 1000% free to comment below and share your own ideas, theories and opinions.  Thanks everyone.

6 Anti-Riders|Speak out

Three things you would change about the Black Brick [17 Jul 2017|04:47pm]
[ mood | excited ]

Well, Three things you’d change about Eldest was pretty popular. So here we come to the big one. A bloated... I hesitate to call it a book, let's say, first draft with a fraction of the content the size would suggest. A meandering, poorly paced storyline whose only accomplishments are to kill off the two most interesting villains in the story, kill off the mentor everyone knew was going to die, and to cause our so called hero to tap dance down the moral event horizon.
Okay, so what three things would YOU changed about the Black Brick? I can never remember how to spell its title.
[Spoiler (click to open)]
Here is mine.
Change 1:
Okay first of all the hunt for the Ra’zac takes up half the book. The story begins with Eragon resolving to hunt down the Ra’zac and Arya going with him instead of Roran. We follow him sneaking towards their base, and dodging patrols since that they have to take them by surprise. Here Arya proves invaluable since she is really experienced at sneaking through the Empire. She did it for years. This both gives Arya some agency, and a purpose in the plot and a chance to develop their bond, romantic or otherwise. This raises the tension for when he finally has his showdown with them. We can factor in the Roran sub plot by showing a skirmish between the Varden and the Empire.

Change 2:
Katrina and Sloan are not in the Ra’zac’s lair since we cut the Carvahall sub plot. Eragon does not waste time wandering through the middle of nowhere in a boring and slow paced story which has him leap over the moral event horizon. This results in him remaining at least somewhat sympathetic. Sort of anyway.

Change 3:
Erm… I change the entire second half of the book. Once again I’m kind of cheating here, but the problem with the Black Brick is that it is so badly paced and put together that there literally isn’t a coherent narrative. Shit just sort of happens with no goal or plan beyond… well nothing.
I’d have Eragon and Arya return to the Varden. There they are beset by a vision sent to them by Galbatorix of Shruikan laying to waste Ellesmera. Instead of Oromis and Gladr dying in an attack on the Empire, they would die defending their home while watching everything they love be burned to the ground. This would be a narrative punch to make us hate {or at least dislike} Galbatorix since Eragon hasn't crossed the moral event horizon.
Eragon is heartbroken, but he refuses to give up fighting Galbatorix. Since this book is the last one before the Empire falls, it is necessary for the Empire to get as close to winning as possible here. Since the only thing which really happens in the Black Brick is Oromis biting it, and the Ra’zac biting it I’ve chosen to make those things the center of the story.

9 Anti-Riders|Speak out

Paolini was right about the toads. [15 Jul 2017|11:30pm]

That silly thing Angela did in one of the book was believe that there were no toads, only frogs. Well today I found an article that said similar things to that : http://mentalfloss.com/article/61808/whats-difference-between-frogs-and-toads

Just a cute thing to share with everyone. 
10 Anti-Riders|Speak out

The Scar of Durza [15 Jul 2017|11:15am]
[ mood | annoyed ]

The scar on Eragon’s back:
Okay so in Eldest Eragon makes no end of angst about the scar he got from Durza. He is constantly getting hurt by it, and it is the subject of an entire sub plot before he is healed. In fact, the scar Durza gave him is in many ways the primary antagonist of the early book. It is the most visible form of the Empire's evil and frequently causes Eragon pain.
Then it gets healed and is never mentioned again, save for Eragon to taunt Murtagh.
I can’t help but feel as though this whole scar sub plot could have been done well. How? Just make it a regular scar. Have it cause Eragon occasional pain, and never fully heal. He carries it wherever he goes as a permanent reminder of the one who gave it to him. He gets used to the pain, but it never fully goes away.
That would have been an almost profound sub plot in a book which is trying far too hard to be profound. Eragon would be forced to admit that combat isn’t all roses, that people are killed and scarred in it. Maybe his elven rival mocks him for it at some point, since elves are always unscarred and stuff.

[Spoiler (click to open)]Vanir’s onslaught continued and Eragon was driven back, as the pain of the scar the Durza gave him resounded through him. His sword was being beaten down, any moment he would fall and be beaten again. Falling to one knee he snatched up some dirt from the ground
’You are supposed to be the dragon rider who we have waited for?!’ roared Vanir ‘You hairless ape! You inferior worm! You scarred monkey!’
Eragon threw dirt in his face and arose. He kicked Vanir in the fork between the legs and bashed him over the head with the flat of his blade, sending the elf crashing into the dirt. ‘I earned this scar fighting Durza, for which I am known as Shadeslayer in the world beyond these woods! What are you elves known as?! Save a distant and uncaring people, content to wait in their homes and be conquered at Galbatorix’s leisure!’
‘You… you cheated…’ said Vanir.

Eragon kicked him in the fork between the legs again. ‘I won.’

Anyway, ultimately Eragon comes to take pride in his scars since they prove his worth or something like that. It would be legitimate character development, and it would be interesting. Also having Eragon be a combat pragmatist who wins through dirty fighting rather than total superiority of magical and physical power would be a welcome change.

I have a character in a book I'm writing who in the first book is dealt a horrible scar on his face while standing his ground against a terrible evil. It periodically causes him pain, and he is sensitive about it. Ironically his mentor openly congratulates him on it, since the character is from a warrior culture and having scars shows you have been in battle, and the main protagonist takes some pride in how he got it, even if he'd much rather not have it.

Anyway, those are my thoughts. I’d like to hear yours.

10 Anti-Riders|Speak out

Brisingr sporck chapter 27: Over Hill and Mountain [14 Jul 2017|10:33pm]

Greetings everyone! I am the DoomOtter and I will be sporking the next chapter of this monstrosity. I am sorry it has taken so long. I had completely forgotten that I had committed to do this, and my turn came up at literally the worst time. I didn’t want to give up the chance, so I hope you’ll forgive me. Anyways this is my first attempt at sporking, so please be gentle.

Over hill and Mountain is a comparatively short chapter, at least by Paolini’s standard, but I still can’t help but feel it should be much shorter. Perhaps it’s my hatred of travel chapters in general. I’ll spare you my gripes with that because there is plenty else to cover here.
Collapse )
54 Anti-Riders|Speak out

Three Things you would change about Eldest [14 Jul 2017|05:01pm]
[ mood | Glad ]

Well, I figure I got a decent response from Three Things you would change about Eragon, so let's do the sequel! We're assuming that the changes you made in the previous book are still in effect, by the way, so you are allowed to build on changes you made earlier.

Here are my changes:
Change 1:
Remove the Roran subplot. It adds precisely nothing to the story and it’s only purpose is to make reading the book less unbearably dull. Which brings me to my second change.

Change 2:
It was either this or remove Nasuada’s sub plot, but since Nasuada’s sub plot introduces some potentially interesting characters, does somewhat affect the plot, and is short I chose this. Cut down the Ellesmera sub plot hugely. No sickening stalker romance, no curse of Durza sub plot. We send Eragon to Ellesmera, introduce the core elements of the elves, and then we do a time skip.

Change 3:
When Eragon attacks the Empire’s army, Murtagh would enter the scene earlier and inflict equal destruction upon the Varden. The Ra'zac would also show up and cause all kinds of carnage, though Eragon or Arya would kill the twins. Murtagh would do everything he did in canon and then he would fight Eragon and beat him up. In the end, the battle is presented as a draw, with both factions suffering horribly. This would add menace to the Empire by demonstrating that they can stand toe to toe with the Varden, and since the Empire has more manpower available the Varden have technically lost.
I’m kind of cheating, but I’d also have Arya show up and save Eragon to prevent Murtagh from taking him, sort of repaying Eragon for saving her earlier. I figure it's all one battle.

Anyway, those are the changes I'd make. What would you do if you were Paolini's editor and had been handed Eldest?

29 Anti-Riders|Speak out

Three Things you would change about Eragon [13 Jul 2017|05:18pm]
[ mood | accomplished ]

So it occurs to me that Antishurtugal is positively overflowing with ideas for how the story of Eragon could have been more entertaining, more interesting and overall a better story. They’re far too numerous to note here, but I thought I’d make a game out of it.

You are Paolini’s editor, and you can convince him to change three things about his first book, Eragon. It could be a story element, a character, or simply a scene.

Here are my suggestions:
Change 1:
The scenes in Carvahall are cut down to a more manageable length. It takes forever for Eragon to get out of Carvahall, and since Carvahall isn’t really relevant to the overarching storyline it doesn’t serve much purpose. Hell, Carvahall isn’t even that fleshed out in the chapters, so we lose literally nothing.

Change 2:
The sequence in Teirm has its ending changed. Instead of leaving peacefully, Jeod’s Varden affiliation is reported by his wife, and Jeod is killed and his house burned to the ground without so much as a trial. Eragon and Brom are forced to flee and narrowly escape with their lives. This would add a definite sense of menace to the Empire, which is sorely lacking in canon.

Change 3:
In the final battle with Durza, Eragon gets his ass kicked. Then Arya goes in and fights with Durza equally, only to be beaten down. Then, just as Durza is about to finish off Arya, Eragon stabs him in the back. This would add more menace to Durza’s character, and give Arya a much-needed resolution to her being tortured by him.

20 Anti-Riders|Speak out

Why Sapphira chose Eragon [10 Jul 2017|12:07pm]
[ mood | Tired ]

So I recently made a post about Chosen Ones as a concept, and how they might be done well. Now I’d like to bring up how this relates to the Inheritance Cycle in order to justify the previous post. Eragon is a chosen one of a sort. Oh true enough, there are no gods he worships who have specifically designated him as the hero, beyond Paolini in a very meta sense, but there is a godlike entity in Sapphira who did choose him.

Throughout the story, dragon riders and the dragons they ride are as close to a god the Varden and the Elves worship as we get, in the sense that their destruction has resulted in an irrational crusade which has no real logical reason to happen.

Anyway, the point I’m coming to is that Eragon is a chosen one, except instead of being chosen by destiny, he is chosen by Sapphira.

Which brings up the question: Why?

[Spoiler (click to open)]Why would Sapphira choose Eragon of all people, when she has been in the presence of many other people who were both infinitely more qualified, or who, even if they weren’t qualified, would have easier access to training. If Sapphira had chosen a kid in Ellesmera or in Farthen Dur, then she wouldn’t have to trek across the length and breadth of the Empire just to get the kid trained.

Eragon has no special characteristics which would make him specially suited to the task. Far from it, one could make the argument that without Sapphira he is nothing, being only an entitled and dimwitted hunter. By all accounts he is a terrible choice.

You know who isn’t a terrible choice? Who would in fact be ideally suited to taking on the Empire? Brom. After all, Brom is already a trained dragon rider. That would mean that he’d only have to brush up on existing skills, and then could have done everything Eragon did with greater ease.

So why Eragon? Well, the obvious answer is that Eragon is Paolini’s self insert, and so naturally Sapphira must hatch for him. It’s his story after all. However I’d like to point out a reason which would have made perfect sense in a better novel.

Eragon lives in a village which is far away from both the Empire’s influence and the Elves influence. Brom would just tow the line if he became a dragon rider, but as a teacher for Eragon, Eragon will learn his skills from someone who has lived in the world of men. He would be able to make his own choices and decisions.

The reason Sapphira never hatched for Arya is because Arya would only act in the interests of the elves. The reason Sapphira never hatched for the Empire is because Galbatorix would at once enslave the rider in question. By hatching for Eragon Sapphira would effectively be making the first new dragon rider totally independent from both factions. Able to see both with a clear head and be able to see their flaws. Thus actually giving her supposedly contemplative nature an outlet to influence the story.

Of course that didn’t happen. Sapphira’s reasons for choosing Eragon are never explained, and Eragon demonstrates himself to be utterly without will of his own. He behaves as a spoiled and entitled fool, easily manipulated by the elves into their personal killing machine. And in a better written book series this could have had an affect on the plot.

But, alas, this is the Inheritance Cycle.

Anyway, those are my thoughts. Make of them what you will.

9 Anti-Riders|Speak out

If you like sporks then you may find this guy entertaining and educational [10 Jul 2017|09:58pm]

RWBY is a western produced web series styled to be an anime. You may or may not already know this. I'm not sure what the cross section of fans is between these communities. Generally speaking its regarded as passable to decent for the budget it has but also has a pretty dedicated fan base. Which are the basic two components required for a hatedom. Enter this dude, FatmanFalling and his extremely in depth and critical analysis of every plot hole, poor explanation, illogical action and inconsistencies present in the series. It's not just someone ranting about a show they don't like, it's a very technical examination as to why it fails on multiple levels. And there's a good bit of wit in there too. It's basically the same sort of sporking you see on this site but in video format. I think he does a good job and I'd recommend you check out his videos even if you haven't seen the original show. Though they are rather long as he analyses the entire season in one go.

5 Anti-Riders|Speak out

Chosen Ones can work [09 Jul 2017|03:49pm]
[ mood | Elated ]

Okay, I think we can all agree that chosen ones have been done to death. Not only that, but their very nature tends to make the story lack narrative and dramatic tension, due to their victory having an unfortunate tendency to be assured before the events of the story could even take place.
So here is a question for the ages. Could it be done well?
I think it could. Part of the problem with chosen ones is that their individual desires tend to be irrelevant to the overall story since they are on a railroad track. Yet what if a chosen one had desires which conflicted with the prophecy? And what if those desires end up going on a collision course with destiny?
 That could be an interesting story.
A chosen one can be done well. You just need to give them agency, make them act on their own, and have them have desires which are independent of destiny, and may even be sent on a collision course with it. Even if they choose to play out destiny exactly as they are supposed to, they will be forced to make very real sacrifices to do it, and that alone would make them more compelling.
What do you think?

16 Anti-Riders|Speak out

Prophecies [09 Jul 2017|07:36pm]


Well I'm still stuck with this copy of Eragon (and have yet to get my fifty bucks back, just to rub it in).
Should I:
a) Spork it
b) Review it
c) Go through it with a red pen
d) Set it on fire and throw it off the Sydney Harbour Bridge
e) All of the above

Collapse )
21 Anti-Riders|Speak out

Bonus Spork: Unanswered Q&A Questions [06 Jul 2017|09:13pm]


A Shurtugal Broken Promise: Colouring Book Promotion Q&A

As part of promotions for the Colouring Book, Paolini via Shurtugal.com announced that he would be going to be doing a new massive Q&A article. They announced it on April 23rd, to be released “in the next few weeks”. If “a few” means “ten weeks and counting”… as at this writing they have not released, or even mentioned the release of, Paolini’s responses.

Collapse )

Anyway, this is What-Might-Have-Been, a spork that I’ve been awaiting for more than 2 months but which will most likely never materialise.

17 Anti-Riders|Speak out

Reasons I don’t really like A Game of Thrones [05 Jul 2017|06:46pm]

(written from the perspective of someone who didn’t make it past the first book and the fifth season)

Collapse )

Now, it is possible that my opinion would be different if Ned Stark didn’t bore me half to death, scaring me off from the next books. And I don’t want to say that whoever likes A Game of Thrones is a terrible person with no taste in literature. I just wanted to vent a bit about a series which is so renowned, and yet has some problems that make it impossible for me to enjoy it.
84 Anti-Riders|Speak out

Dialogue Question (Writer Related but not Eragon) [05 Jul 2017|11:17am]


I have a dialogue question for another show I am working on. It is not really a question related to Eragon but I really enjoy the articles and deep conversations on this forum.

My question is what should Owen have said if his 4 raptors from the movie survived?

Collapse )

7 Anti-Riders|Speak out

The Fluid Nature of Paolini's characterization [04 Jul 2017|11:07am]
[ mood | aggravated ]

The Fluid nature of Paolini’s characterization:
Something I noticed when I read Eragon through to half way through the Black Brick is that characters personalities have an uncanny tendency to shift between books. And I’m pretty sure I know why.

I’ll go into detail below:

[Spoiler (click to open)]Collapse )
My point, if I have a point, is that the constant shifting of characterization is a serious flaw. Not only did it fail to get the audience to pick Eragon as their favorite character, it destroys the continuity and makes us resent Eragon for getting all the screen time and Paolini for trying to force him down our throats. Why get invested in a character if you know their personality is going to do a complete one-eighty as soon as the Author decides he wants them to do something else?

What do you think?

46 Anti-Riders|Speak out

[ viewing | most recent entries ]
[ go | earlier ]